Epiphanies, Magic and Ricky Ricardos

WoW! Almost a year to the day when one of us last posted. Do y'all know we started this in 2011??!! We are hilarious!! So much has changed since we started. I am not even sure if we are Candy Girl, Blondie and Gypsy anymore. What do you guys think? She we have new names? And if so, what should they be? I try to think about who we are now. Although I think maybe we are still deciding. And I think that's ok. Because if we weren't changing, weren't growing we would be in a constant state of rutted. My Jews would not like that, and I want my adopted people happy. So here I am for all intent and purposes in New York City...ok in Westchester...home of the rich and richer. I am a National and International Writer, I co-own a business that is growing quickly and I love a Ricky Ricardo who loves me back. But you know what? I still feel like a chubby teen who still doesn't know what in the HELL she is doing. Time passes so quickly and lessons learned become more poignant and more refined/defined. Love is a tricky think for me. I'm still not sure if I trust it or not. And my Ricky is a constant surprise. New love in middle years brings a whole new perspective. I am learning to let myself be loved...which is not easy! I am the nurture-er, not the nurtured. And all My Ricky wants to do is take care of me and make sure I am happy. My BIGGEST issue is appreciating the day IN the day and not over thinking things. I am REALLY bad at over thinking things--much to my detriment. My Ricky said something to me, and I don't know if it will resonate with you guys, but growing up with an alcoholic parent these words were a huge epiphany to me. Ricky said, " I have bad days, I have bad moods, you drive me crazy but I am NOT going to stop loving you." And I thought to myself, "WoW"! I have spent my whole entire life trying to gauge other people's moods and putting it on myself to make them happy. It was my job to anticipate how things were going by watching people...watching their faces. I realized I don't have to do that, I just have to be me. And although it's hard to let that go, a huge weight was lifted. So, my dear girls, here's to a new year and here's to epiphanies. Here's to growing more in love...with ourselves. Here's to finding things that not only pay the bills but nourishes our spirit. We bring magic because we are filled with magic...don't ever forget that. Love you both so much! #3 (Until I find a better name)