Hello my girlies! I am finally back! Wow! Has it been so long? Where is time going?
And as I mentioned in the title - " What the heck am I doing here?" This is a question I have been asking myself so much lately concerning my business. Do you both ever feel like you are working and working and working without alot to show for it and in the process of it all you miss out on the everyday things like sunrises and sunsets ( Most days I am out before one and still in after the other ) and just being able to sit and do nothing and think about nothing and just enjoy a cup of coffee from start to finish without it going cold over and over? I am so sure you both can relate at one time or another. This has been fun at times, rewarding at times, and a huge blessing at times, but it is just soooo hard. I think that I am just not up to the demands of it sometimes. Such as this past weekend.......
O.K...Blondie, you so know the person who hired me for this job....think about the initials...CZ....library...intimidation....rudeness....not one of our favorites...to put it in other words...we would have rather plowed the south 40 that gotten this icy uppity stare...LOL....but, as what happens with most people like this that used to intimidate us, they mellow with age and actually turn out to be pretty nice in the older years...LOL...She actually hugged me! Imagine that?
It was her daughter's second marriage and supposed to be a "small quiet affair at a condo in Perdido Key...about 40 guests at the most....Wellllll....that turned to 55 three days before and actually turned into 80 - 100!!!It was just Ringo and I and we ran our butts off!...and then I was asked to pour wine from the bar the night before which left Ringo dealing with the buffet alone....Help!!!!! It was a beautiful lounge overlooking the gulf that had a baby grand piano and a bar and was decorated amazingly! The wedding took place one floor down in an atrium that you could look down on from the lounge, so the guests could hear everything we said and likewise...LOL...well, during the wedding I dropped a glass lid to a chafer on the marble floor and it shattered to a million pieces just moments before the wedding was over! I scrambled to find a broom and we got it cleaned up just in the nick of time..I am so sure that they heard my Margaret yip in the middle of the vows LOL...the wedding was supposed to begin at two and end about 2:30 - 3:00...it was over @ 2:15!!!! And people were literally scrambling to get up the elevator to get to the beer ( which at this fancy little affair, they drug up in ice chests and was in cans rather than bottles LOL and wine! I didn't even have time to apply fresh lipstick or get pictures of anything! LOL Well, all of these snooty girls and guys started coming up the the bar and asking for wine that I couldn't even pronounce...LOL...Pino what? Chardo Who? The only ones I was familiar with was moscato, merlot, and there was amazingly a bottle of arbour mist thrown in the mishmosh of what they had purchased...LOL LOL..( That actually went home to live with me in exchange for all of the BS indured at the bar, such as a very drunk 65 or so year old man that kept asking if I worked there and winking at me..LOL....And then you had your older socialites, many of whom we remember well that came in the library way back when ( you would have remembered them all Blondie) coming up and asking do you have asdfghj&^%$#@ wine? LOL...so, they simply settled with "no mam, I have melot, moscato, california white, chardonay, sweet red." And of course I got a drawn out Bay Minette-style "oooooooohhhhhh." Well, give me merlot, I suppose." Geez!!!!! I didn't buy this cheap selection! LOL To make it worse, I cannot uncork a bottle to save my life! I always wind up with my cork stuck down in the bottle and cork shavings in the wine when I finally get it out, so I had to keep running to the kitchen to get my Ringo to uncork for me...Needless to say, he was really crabby for having to deal with replenishing the buffet alone and didn't much like stopping to uncork for me...LOL.
So, I believe I need using a corkscrew lessons as well as a crash course in wine...LOL The funny thing is, most of the people from the past that used to intimidate me so just mildly irritated me and I realized that they were no better than anyone else and even though they would like people to think they are all social and well versed, many of them butchered these wine names worse than me and I just wanted to crack up laughing every time I had one of them ask for Pinot Noir and pronounced it something like " Penis Eleanor" or Muscato like " Moosekatoe" and may as well have said mousekateer..LOL...LOL. It was definitely an evening I will never forget! There was not a bit of food left over and just enough to pack up a picnic basket for the bride and groom...We finished cleaning, took out 12 large bags of trash, most of which were empty beer cans..lol..and left them all watching the LSU game on the big screen TV that rose up out of the wall.they were fascinated with that little gadget and kept letting it up and down..LOL..I almost dropped a wine glass when one of them yelled a " Who DAT???" ...who in the world watches a football game during a wedding reception???!!! ( They also were given 10 cases of beer for a wedding present that the Bride's mother was scandalized over that someone put on top of the Baby Grand Piano and she ran frantically to me and asked for something large enough to cover it up with.
All I had was a white silk tablecloth...She covered it nicely with that stomping and fuming the whole time. LOL As with my earlier experience with the Certain Country Club in the woods of our hometown, LOL...You just can't take the redneck out of some people. There are two types...good old country redneck, and uppity redneck...I call them the " red carpet rednecks " LOL LOL LOL
...... And then, I got back up at 4 yesterday morning and had a huge stacked cake and a 1/2 sheet birthday cake due out by 10, as well as cleaning up and putting away from the night before....when I finally got home yesterday, I fell into bed and mindlessly watched episodes of Sex In The City and slept all afternoon. Ringo told me that we both seem to be walking around like Zombies lately with our arms stuck out in front of us- me saying make more cakes...need more icing...him saying more green beans, more potatoes, more meat...LOL...LOL...He is working 12 - 14 hours a day, six days a week on " Salary" that breaks down to be way less than minimum wage per hour and it's really taking it's toll on him. I am worried about how hard he is working and still trying to help me in our business. Maybe it will get better soon. Probably not. Catering is just hard. And it's one of the most
underestimated, thankless, taken for granted jobs that there are. People truly don't realize what is involved and most of the time try to cheap you down on the menu, not realizing that it's not really about the cost of the food, it's the service and work involved. Most of the time you wind up doing many things that your weren't paid to do just to make sure everything goes off smoothly. People just take for granted that they can magically show up and everything will be done, some of which they were supposed to take care of and didn't and of course you don't get paid for it, nor do you get paid for the extra 50 people that showed up that you magically had enough food for. ( I am so revising my contract this week!!! ) And then there are those who are three feet from a garbage can but leave a table full of food, plates, cups, napkins and beer cans and wine glasses and hold up their hand from across the room and expect you to come clear it away for them and when you do, ask you to bring them more beer...and in your head you are having an Ally McBeal moment and telling them, " I am not an FN waitress buddy! Get it yourself! " and biting your tongue, you say, " Sir, the ice chests are by the bar. It is self-serve so you may choose which type you would like. " They glare at you and get up and get it themselves mumbling!
And another question....who in the hell came up with monogrammed beer koozies?!!!!!
Totally redneck!!!!! I wish weddings would just go back to sweet, gentle afternoon affairs with punch, cake, nuts and mints and be classy and elegant and not a drunken episode of Roseanne meets Dynasty! LOL
Geez!!!!! I think I just climbed up on my soapbox again! LOL...I will step down now and go grab another cup of coffee and get a shower and get ready to go in and make 100 red velvet cake balls and wish you both a happy Monday. I so wish you both could be at the shop with me today to drink coffee and discuss these things...LOL...It would be so much fun! And I think it would so totally make me feel better to have both your perspectives and empathy on how to deal with these catering jobs that kick my fanny!
I love you both so much! Thank you for reading my rant! Please type a rant of your own and I will read it with gladness. :)
Candy Girl ( Who is thinking of changing her name )
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